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Battling your ex in court can hurt your case and your kids

On Behalf of | Oct 18, 2022 | Uncontested Divorce

Couples with children often have more difficult divorces than those who only have to share property. After all, while you might compromise about where you live or what kind of car you drive, you absolutely cannot compromise about the protection of your children and the maintenance of your relationship with them.

Parents who want nothing more than to be with their children as much as possible can actually cause a lot of harm if they employ the wrong approach in their upcoming custody proceedings. Litigated custody matters can be very difficult for children, especially if there is a lot of conflict at home.

The more you fight with your ex about custody, the stronger the impact of those disputes on your children and possibly your custody rights.

Parental conflict is hard on children

Divorce is never easy for children still living with their parents, but it is particularly stressful and damaging for children to witness their parents fighting bitterly with one another. Needing to overhear parents bad-mouthing one another can be another source of stress. Children witnessing frequent parental conflicts may have a hard time performing in school or may lash out at others because of their emotional response to the conflict between their parents.

Fighting against your ex can make you look like a bad parent

Family law judges have seen it all, and many of them know the harm that one parent can cause the children in the family by making a custody matter a bitter fight. Although there is something to be said about a parent seeking to protect their children by seeking sole custody in this scenario involving extreme issues like alcohol addiction or physical abuse, most parents seeking sole custody don’t have justification for doing so.

A judge may develop a negative view of a parent who seemingly wants to cut their ex out of the children’s lives. After all, such behaviors often stem from personal emotional preferences rather than a focus on what is best for the children. If you appear particularly contentious in family court and unwilling to cooperate with your ex, a judge may factor that into how they ultimately divide your parenting time and other parental responsibilities.

The two of you can avoid all of that stress and drama by working with one another to maintain the peace and preserve a healthy co-parenting relationship. Keeping the focus of your custody matters on what is best for the children will benefit them and also help you secure a better outcome through an amicable divorce.